My apologies for the constantly shifting state of the blog at the moment! I figured that after 8 years it was probably time to update the formatting (I know it's a bit cluttered, I'll be playing around and working on fixing that whenever I have time in between work,work,dance and school over the next few months) ... Spring just always seems to awaken a cleaning-organizational frenzy in me that knows no bounds! Finding ways to avoid thesis-work has nothing to do with it, I assure you ;).
Truly though, it seems to happen with the first appearance of a warm summer sun (which admittedly disappeared again somewhere in amongst the snow, hail and rain that mysteriously returned this past weekend :P). I suddenly need to be even tidier than my normally-OCD-ish habits. I scrub down the house, have an overwhelming urge to get rid of anything superfluous - an urge which usually runs afoul of my equally strong tendency toward pack-rat-ishness - I go through all my emails, clean out my computer files and, now, apparently revamp my blog!
It's actually rather funny to sit back and watch the two parts of myself fight it out. There's just something incredibly satisfying about shedding all those unnecessary gizmo's, gadgets, old clothes and unused objects. It's lightening and relaxing in a way I can't quite describe. It's almost as though you're somehow magically relieved of any unwanted burdens. Living with the very basic stuff you need and one or two keepsakes is just so freeing - part of what I love about backpacking I suppose. And yet, at the same time, there's something so heartbreaking about giving up something that's been with you through experience after experience, holding all the memories that have somehow become buried under the weight of fresh info in your brain... loosing that can just be so devastating. Particularly when whatever gets lost is gone before you're ready - before you've come to terms with those memories or found some other vessel to contain them (yes mother, I'm looking at you and that time you threw out my yellow duck when I was 5)...
That was one of the great things about living abroad for so long. Having only what I needed there with me but knowing that all of my other stuff, my memories and my childhood keepsakes were held back here in Canada for me. At the same time it's funny how much stuff you can accrue without even intending to. Moving back from England I had that problem. I seem to be having it again now that I'm moving to a new place in a few months time (more on that later!). It's funny too how when you do come back, you realise that you don't really want all of that stuff. The memory of it is enough... that and knowing that it will continue to be loved elsewhere by someone else, or at least be put to use in some other way. In many ways having my parents move (again) while I was in Europe this past summer was hard because I felt like, once again, I was losing my base and my tether to who I was (there is definitely something to be said for having all of your stuff in one place or within easy access!) and, yet, when I came home and sorted through my stuff to determine what was staying with me downtown and what I would send up north, I realised that almost all of it was going to go up north, And, more importantly, that I didn't really want to have it here (with the exception of my books of course - those I always want nearby!). I wonder sometimes how much of my wanting to keep things is the archaeologist in me. Wanting to preserve things for future generations, so that my potential future kids and kids' kids can get an idea of what it was like to be me, to live in this time... silly really, my room up north almost already feels like a museum... and I'm wondering now if I should change it to be more in sync with me. Or should I leave it as a monument. There have actually been many times where the fact that I've kept things has proved useful. Still, something tells me I'm leaning more toward the former. Being me though, it's likely I'll find a way to combine both options ;). At any rate, I definitely want to do a clean out and sort through of all of my stuff when I move in the summer. Something to do with closing the academic chapter of my life? Certainly not the childhood one as I've no plans to grow up - nor the educational one as I've no plans to stop learning!
Strange... that's basically what this blog has become for me... A place where I can unload all of my experiences, unclutter my mind and leave it open and airy to make way for new things without losing any of the old. It's also in many ways just as much a monument to nostalgia as is my museum of a room up north. Reading back over previous blog posts is great not only because it reminds me of what I've done, but how I thought, who I was, and how I've become who I've become. It's great to see the ways in which I and my perspectives have changed, not changed, reverted and fluctuated over the years (a bit vain I realise, but also very humbling in that it shows both the good and the bad).
I'm sorry, not sure what prompted the philosophical leanings and introspection of this post (ugh! but looking at the language you can tell I've been in the academic world for far too long! Hopefully the next post wont be so bad!). I do seem to go off like this whenever I encounter a milestone event (and yes, by that I do mean yet another graduation :P) don't I? I guess it just means that change prompts introspection in the same way that spring prompts cleaning ;).
From a practical perspective, in addition to rearranging the furniture (so to speak) and changing the background, I updated the links on my side bar - they're all fantastic sites and you should check them out if you haven't already!
I do have some life updates to post about (such as the move mentioned in passing above). Nothing too exciting though as I've now been in the country doing the same thing for approximately a year (can you believe that this time last year I was on my way back over to Europe? *sighs* Not that I don't love Toronto, because I do. I love nearly everything about it, from the uber polite and friendly people to those somewhat grumpy ones who still apologize, from the charming little pockets of downtown, to the lake, the sky scrapers and our wonderful parks. Still, I'm just not the type to stay in one place forever... and ten months is beginning to feel nearly that long! Fortunately I'm off to Calgary in a few weeks to visit ma who is working out that way and then off to Indianapolis (of all places) in late June for a conference, so I suppose I can't really complain ;P) Anyhow, boring or not, I will do an update all the same ;)! That being said, I am, unfortunately, going to be late for work (in addition to having a very burnt omelet for lunch) if I don't stop blogging soon!
More updates to come, I promise!
Happy Passover/Easter/any other holidays I am missing!
Truly though, it seems to happen with the first appearance of a warm summer sun (which admittedly disappeared again somewhere in amongst the snow, hail and rain that mysteriously returned this past weekend :P). I suddenly need to be even tidier than my normally-OCD-ish habits. I scrub down the house, have an overwhelming urge to get rid of anything superfluous - an urge which usually runs afoul of my equally strong tendency toward pack-rat-ishness - I go through all my emails, clean out my computer files and, now, apparently revamp my blog!
It's actually rather funny to sit back and watch the two parts of myself fight it out. There's just something incredibly satisfying about shedding all those unnecessary gizmo's, gadgets, old clothes and unused objects. It's lightening and relaxing in a way I can't quite describe. It's almost as though you're somehow magically relieved of any unwanted burdens. Living with the very basic stuff you need and one or two keepsakes is just so freeing - part of what I love about backpacking I suppose. And yet, at the same time, there's something so heartbreaking about giving up something that's been with you through experience after experience, holding all the memories that have somehow become buried under the weight of fresh info in your brain... loosing that can just be so devastating. Particularly when whatever gets lost is gone before you're ready - before you've come to terms with those memories or found some other vessel to contain them (yes mother, I'm looking at you and that time you threw out my yellow duck when I was 5)...
That was one of the great things about living abroad for so long. Having only what I needed there with me but knowing that all of my other stuff, my memories and my childhood keepsakes were held back here in Canada for me. At the same time it's funny how much stuff you can accrue without even intending to. Moving back from England I had that problem. I seem to be having it again now that I'm moving to a new place in a few months time (more on that later!). It's funny too how when you do come back, you realise that you don't really want all of that stuff. The memory of it is enough... that and knowing that it will continue to be loved elsewhere by someone else, or at least be put to use in some other way. In many ways having my parents move (again) while I was in Europe this past summer was hard because I felt like, once again, I was losing my base and my tether to who I was (there is definitely something to be said for having all of your stuff in one place or within easy access!) and, yet, when I came home and sorted through my stuff to determine what was staying with me downtown and what I would send up north, I realised that almost all of it was going to go up north, And, more importantly, that I didn't really want to have it here (with the exception of my books of course - those I always want nearby!). I wonder sometimes how much of my wanting to keep things is the archaeologist in me. Wanting to preserve things for future generations, so that my potential future kids and kids' kids can get an idea of what it was like to be me, to live in this time... silly really, my room up north almost already feels like a museum... and I'm wondering now if I should change it to be more in sync with me. Or should I leave it as a monument. There have actually been many times where the fact that I've kept things has proved useful. Still, something tells me I'm leaning more toward the former. Being me though, it's likely I'll find a way to combine both options ;). At any rate, I definitely want to do a clean out and sort through of all of my stuff when I move in the summer. Something to do with closing the academic chapter of my life? Certainly not the childhood one as I've no plans to grow up - nor the educational one as I've no plans to stop learning!
Strange... that's basically what this blog has become for me... A place where I can unload all of my experiences, unclutter my mind and leave it open and airy to make way for new things without losing any of the old. It's also in many ways just as much a monument to nostalgia as is my museum of a room up north. Reading back over previous blog posts is great not only because it reminds me of what I've done, but how I thought, who I was, and how I've become who I've become. It's great to see the ways in which I and my perspectives have changed, not changed, reverted and fluctuated over the years (a bit vain I realise, but also very humbling in that it shows both the good and the bad).
I'm sorry, not sure what prompted the philosophical leanings and introspection of this post (ugh! but looking at the language you can tell I've been in the academic world for far too long! Hopefully the next post wont be so bad!). I do seem to go off like this whenever I encounter a milestone event (and yes, by that I do mean yet another graduation :P) don't I? I guess it just means that change prompts introspection in the same way that spring prompts cleaning ;).
From a practical perspective, in addition to rearranging the furniture (so to speak) and changing the background, I updated the links on my side bar - they're all fantastic sites and you should check them out if you haven't already!
I do have some life updates to post about (such as the move mentioned in passing above). Nothing too exciting though as I've now been in the country doing the same thing for approximately a year (can you believe that this time last year I was on my way back over to Europe? *sighs* Not that I don't love Toronto, because I do. I love nearly everything about it, from the uber polite and friendly people to those somewhat grumpy ones who still apologize, from the charming little pockets of downtown, to the lake, the sky scrapers and our wonderful parks. Still, I'm just not the type to stay in one place forever... and ten months is beginning to feel nearly that long! Fortunately I'm off to Calgary in a few weeks to visit ma who is working out that way and then off to Indianapolis (of all places) in late June for a conference, so I suppose I can't really complain ;P) Anyhow, boring or not, I will do an update all the same ;)! That being said, I am, unfortunately, going to be late for work (in addition to having a very burnt omelet for lunch) if I don't stop blogging soon!
More updates to come, I promise!
Happy Passover/Easter/any other holidays I am missing!